Saturday, 20 August 2011

random freewrite

sat listening to nizlopi (half these songs are about you) and trying to bring myself to get through some personal admin.  so this is a little bit of procrastination.

(in other news, i am in edinburgh, still in love with this country.  the weather has been kind, and the natives also.  the past few days have been scattered with beautiful running into friends, conversations with strangers, laughter, a brilliance of variety, and a gradual re-engagement with myself).

-this makes me hurt right here
she points to her stomach
-and here
she touches her chest
-you have left me so that i no longer know the right way
to breathe air
every time i inhale, bronchiole become broken glass
shards of air mock lungs no longer interested in using them anyway
and that part of me that you loved best but couldn’t stand
it does all it can to keep me crushed
god, this isn’t crushing
but it has left me immobile, pinned to the point
of no return
returning nonetheless every day to this -
after ruminating on every alternative -
that my mother was right:
you can only know who you love,
never who loves you

sat 20 aug 2011 16.33 dalkeith road

3 comments:

  1. such wisdom in those last lines

    ReplyDelete
  2. Heya,

    I have moved my old poems from MySpace to a new blog and will be adding to it (only just set it up tonight). Just wanted you to know:

    http://asphaltlayersofcorruption.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  3. lil, what can i say - my mum is a wise woman!

    shirley - super awesome!

    ReplyDelete